When we got back from Toronto it was 3:30 AM on Monday morning. I had done the last part of the drive because dad is more of a daylight and early evening driver. He doesn’t like to drive past normal bed times. It was my fault that we were getting in late since I insisted upon watching the World Cup Final game between Italy and France. The highlight of the game was that after two hours of the announcers building-up the retiring French star Zidane to be the second coming of Christ when it came to class, sportsmanship, and skill the guy gave a full force head butt into an Italian.

Upon arriving home I was disgusted, but not surprised, to find the bathtub filled with the dried remnants of the Friday attempt to exorcise the demons of the drain. Since I was awake at 3:30 AM I didn’t have any great urge to sleep. So instead I poured a heaping portion of Drano into the dried-up drain using the logic that since it was dry the Drano could finally find the clog and zap it.

An hour later I was back at fussing with the drain again with the water clogged back into the tub and reinvigorating the refuse with the life of water. I went to the kitchen to find that the vegetables from our weekend had generally turned into rot and mush. The basil, which I figured would keep for a few weeks for caprese salad was all black and was dripping a black liquid. The cantaloupe that I had bought because the fruit salads at the Deroche Supermarket were $6.99 for a tiny amount of fruit was soft enough to put my finger into it and covered with mold.

I was getting fed-up with the smell and the rot of returning home so I tossed all of the vegetables and whatever molding or dried bread floating in the kitchen. I cursed the mice and wiped the stove and vowed to bring a cat home as soon as possible.

I then used the Internet to look-up how to clear a clogged tub drain. The net showed an article with various solutions including covering the drain overflow at the top with a towel while plunging. There was one diagram of removing the drain overflow cap to then use the auger to unclog hidden problems. So I undid the cover and pulled out my rarely useful auger. This time I followed the instructions and carefully snaked it down the opening. Then I closed the nut that tightens around the wire snake. I turned the auger a bunch of times at the bottom. I pulled it back out seeing no effect and went back to the sink to clean out the auger to remove the goop and Drano that might maim me if I touched me. I looked back at the tub and the water was flowing down. I had cleared the drain.

I took the rotting vegetables down stairs and went to sleep.

I didn’t see Madeline until the afternoon since I slept in until about 11 and then went to the gym. I watched a reality show about over privileged Hollywood socialites who were getting their super Sweet 16 party with prices of over $200,000 per party. They had one that remade Vegas and had some pop band play and another who created a Cirque-De-Soleil atmosphere and was pissed that the hotel wouldn’t let her suspend circus performers from the ceiling of a banquet hall. It made me think that they should make a reality TV show just like it for my super bachelor party. It would probably have to be on HBO or the Playboy channel but it would probably be more interesting. I took a shower both before and after going to the gym and felt clean after having wiped down the tub with Comet.

Madeline was a dream to see. It’s hard to imagine how much I can love her until I am about to see her after a long time away and miss her in that last moment. It is like when you need to go to the bathroom and know the rest stop is coming soon. I just wanted to hug her, hold her, kiss her, and throw her up in the air. Then I took her home to my nice, recently cleaned little world.